


Wishes Are Not What They Seem

by NoCommentHere



Category: Lenore: The Cute Little Dead Girl
Genre: Angst, Depression, Drama, F/M, I wrote this 5 years ago, Menstruation, Oral Sex, Pregnancy, Sex, Suicide Attempt, alright, grown-up Lenore, human/vampire Ragamuffin, relationship angst, well teenage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2017-09-08
Packaged: 2018-12-25 10:36:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12034137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoCommentHere/pseuds/NoCommentHere
Summary: She always wanted to be alive again, to grow up, to mature like other girls. But she didn't know that those would bring an unexpected turn of events in her life. And they all involved Ragamuffin.





	Wishes Are Not What They Seem

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Lenore, Ragamuffin and co. belong to Roman Dirge.

 

 

 

 

 

 

She believed it was a joke, an attempt to humor, because she was a little girl, and grown-ups loved little girls. Well, normal grown-ups.

She didn't even grasp the possibility of that woman actually being a witch. And that she actually had real powers. Like those in the books and the movies she always watched along with an unimpressed, deadpan Ragamuffin.

How was it possible that life could be restored after more than one hundred years of death?

Lenore contemplated what happened that day. She was a little bored that Ragamuffin slept in his coffin- because that was what he had constantly done every day, since Pooty transformed him into a vampire again- so she decided to go out for a walk, carrying the last dead kitty after her.

After walking through the town for hours, she somehow bumped into a tall, dark-haired lady, who smiled at her in a quite strange way, almost as if she had found out something that Lenore didn't know. She oddly started to have conversation with her, about random, unimportant things, and Lenore didn't realize how it happened, but they ended up discussing about her vampire best friend.

The lady had a dark glint in her eyes as Lenore talked about how well she and Ragamuffin got along, how she had found him a hundred years ago on the street, how he had managed to regain his old, vampire form after all this time. She didn't even know why she told that stranger all those things, because no one in their right mind would actually believe that she was a dead little girl who lived with a vampire.

Lenore presumed that the lady would eventually conclude that she was a child with too much imagination, so she didn't think it was really that bad if she told someone about those things. It was like something from outside her willpower constrained her to say more and more.

To her surprise, the lady was actually interested in her sayings, because she looked fixedly at Lenore, while she was talking animatedly.

"Tell me, blonde child." The woman suddenly spoke, a strange smile tugging at her lips. "What are you to this vampire?"

Lenore stopped and blinked in confusion at the strange woman. Her mouth formed a tight line as she knitted her brow, trying to understand the woman's question.

"What do you mean?"

The lady slightly leaned over, as if she intended to whisper into Lenore's ear. To her relief, she just approached her head to Lenore's and lowered her voice.

"I mean, how does he feel about you?" She asked. "Are you like a little sister to him? A friend? What?"

Lenore gazed up at the woman, quite taken aback by her words, since no one had ever asked her something like that. She didn't even think about her relationship with Ragamuffin. She just liked to spend time with him and have fun together. If Lenore considered better, he also seemed to be quite protective of her and she was grateful to him for that, because he had helped her get out of many troublesome situations.

"Well, we're best friends." She retorted. "I know I get on his nerves, but he still looks after me."

The woman narrowed her eyes, apparently thinking about what Lenore had just said.

"So he cares about you." She concluded. Lenore shrugged.

"I guess so."

The woman stepped back, before she gave Lenore that strange smile that she wasn't really fond of, because it gave her the impression that she was planning something.

"Do you want to be alive again?"

Lenore enlarged her eyes as she choked in shock. She reeled backwards, suddenly frightened by the woman's gloating expression.

"What?" It was less of an answer and more of an automatic response. The woman nodded as to confirm her earlier question.

"I can give you life again." She said. "Think about it. You can recover what you have lost all those years. You could have grown like other normal children."

Lenore's brain became a little fuzzy as her eyes glazed over with fascination and fear. That was her deepest wish and her oldest, most painful regret. She always imagined what she would have been like if she had the possibility to pass through later years like all the people she saw around her everyday. To go through changes, to become different, to mature. It was an old, lost dream that she gave up on, after her death.

Why was the woman telling her all those things? Was she joking? Was she trying to make her laugh? If that was the case, then it wasn't working at all. In fact, it depressed and saddened her terribly and, to such an extent, that she started tearing, since she wasn't used to all those sudden emotions. As if the woman read her mind, she spoke before even Lenore asked.

"And I'm not joking nor lying, my dear one." She promptly worded. "I have the power to offer you life." There was a pause. "I'm a witch."

Lenore didn't know what to think anymore. She was dumbstruck. She lifted her face, eyes glassy with tears and face red, before she opened her mouth unsure.

"I…"

The woman softened her expression while her smile widened considerably. She got closer to the small, downhearted child, putting her palm on the top of Lenore's forehead.

"I know."

…

And that was how she found herself trembling in excitement and joyousness later in the evening, staring at her slightly colored hands. Warm hands, hands that had blood flowing through them again. Chest that had a beating heart inside once again. Blue, bright eyes, shining as they gazed at the mirror, at the radiant hair, at the glowing skin, at an expression full of life.

Life. She was alive. She was actually  _alive_.

And she wanted to cry in happiness.

She heard steps on the main stairs and she turned to see Ragamuffin, who stared at her as if he was seeing her for the first time after many years. His eyes were wide and she wasn't sure, but they appeared to have some weird, red glint in them, a glint that he only had when he was really hungry.

Lenore gave him a grin, before she ran and bumped into him, encircling his waist with her small arms and burying her face into his stomach. It was weird, sticking to him like that, because they didn't use to snuggle and hug, especially after he had become a vampire. Lenore squeezed him a lot when he had been a doll, but she couldn't do that to him as a grown-up man for some reason. 

Ragamuffin suddenly tensed up and became rigid in the moment she touched him. He didn't even respond to her hug, he just remained impassive as he looked down on her, with one of the most captivated, ferocious expressions Lenore had ever seen him have.

He pried her hands off him and backed away with a face that suggested he was trying really hard not to dash at her.

That was when she realized that she wasn't dead anymore and that spurred serious consequences.

Consequences like the fact that she had fresh blood flowing through her body and Ragamuffin consumed fresh blood. And the fact that she was in irremediable danger because of this.

She had become one of his  _preys_.

"What's going on?" He asked, in a strained tone, as he still had the predatory look in his eyes, most surely against his will, because he was twisting his features in great efforts not to look at her like she was mouthwatering. Lenore fiddled with the fabric of her dress.

"How is it possible?" His voice was dumfounded, frustrated, and hungrier by the second. "How is it possible that you're alive?"

Lenore remembered the strange woman. She still had no idea why she did that; why she gave her life. There had to be a reason, but Lenore had been so dazed and shocked that she couldn't even think properly in the moment the witch had touched her head and changed her. Then she suddenly disappeared, as if she didn't even exist. The circumstances had been too odd.

"There was this woman who claimed to be a witch." Lenore carefully answered. She could see Ragamuffin frown in disbelief and suspicion.

"A witch?"

Lenore nodded.

"Yeah. I talked to her about us, then she asked me if I wanted to be alive again, and some other weird questions." His confused expression was slowly changing into a horrified one. He raised his eyes and stared blankly at some undefined point in the air, like he had suddenly realized something terrible.

"This is not good. This is not good at all." He muttered. His gaze then fell on Lenore again. "Why did you talk to her?" His tone was almost accusing and she felt a little taken aback by it.

"I-I didn't-" Lenore pursed her lips when she noticed that she was mumbling. "I didn't want to, but-" She stopped, at a loss for words. "I don't even know."

Ragamuffin pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes, inhaling deeply in an attempt to calm himself down. He sighed.

"She definitely wants something." He spoke worried. "Witches don't do altruistic things for people, unless they're up to something. Trust me, I met one a hundred years ago." Lenore blinked as she remembered that Ragamuffin had actually been cursed to be a doll by one.

"I bet she bewitched you into talking to her." He said, slightly angry.

Lenore looked down, sensing emotions mixing inside her after her friend's last words. All her happiness was fading away to be replaced by disappointment and sorrow. She almost knew that everything was too good to be real, because there had to be a flaw. There was always a flaw.

She heard Ragamuffin's movement and she looked up to see him a little closer to her.

"I'm sorry, Lenore." He spoke, filled with regret. "I know how much it means to you." He stopped and they gazed at each other for a few moments. Lenore felt a clench in her heart, although she didn't say anything. She stepped forward, attempting to hug him, but Ragamuffin hurriedly backed away.

"Don't." He told her, as if he was in pain. "You have no idea what you're doing to me, now that you're alive." His voice was lower than usually. "I can barely control myself."

Fear pricked at Lenore's mind when she observed that he watched her like he wanted to ravish her. He turned and started heading towards the main door.

"I'm going to hunt before I eat you." He spoke and Lenore felt a little disturbed. He stopped for a brief moment and threw her one last look as he opened the door.

"It's going to be really difficult for us to live together from now on."

…

They eventually got used to the new situation, although it was difficult. They didn't spend that much time together, because Ragamuffin constantly had that hungry look in his eyes every time he watched her, which frightened Lenore and made her avoid him most of the time.

He avoided her as well, for her own safety. Lenore didn't like that they had to see each other less often, but she knew they had no choice in the end. Even though she had been really happy when the witch offered her life, the excitement faded away after she realized what her new condition imposed.

Frustration and anger bubbled inside her every time Ragamuffin walked into the room and quickly left it after he saw her. She couldn't stand it, seeing him fighting with his own self like that, refraining from attacking her. She was aware that it was for her own good, that he only cared about her and that was why he had decided it was for the best if they lived like two strangers.

But she didn't like that. She didn't like that at all.

She wanted to spend time in his company again, so an insane idea came to her mind, after a few months of loneliness.

She decided to take her own life, so that she could be dead once more. So that they wouldn't have to avoid each other anymore.

When Ragamuffin found her with the knife, prepared to slice her own neck, he bolted and snatched it from her hands and Lenore had never seen him so angry.

He had been so shocked by her suicidal attempt that he started keeping her under surveillance at every hour of the day. Lenore was impressed by his concern that took over his mind entirely and captured him to such an extent that he seemed to forget about his desire to consume her. She was somewhat baffled, although contentment rose inside her, because her intention to kill herself really solved her problem, after all.

They began spending more time together and he even allowed her to hug him like in the old days, even though only for a certain amount of time. He gained control over his instincts and managed to spend hours in her company, without thinking about his strong will to eat her.

And years passed. If she hadn't felt them before, now Lenore was definitely aware of the changes that time brought in her life.

After almost three years, she started to be self conscious about her personal image. It was too sudden when she woke up in one morning and saw her image in the mirror, her face that was slightly different, her features that weren't that childish anymore and her blue eyes that had a certain, different shine in them. She felt some sort of odd disgust at her messy hair, at her old, roughed dress, things that she hadn't cared about before.

Her mouth curled downwards in repulsion, before she descended the stairs barefoot, until she reached the dark basement, where Ragamuffin used to reside during the day. There was a complete silence, as only a small ray of light fell through the thick bars of the basement window and Lenore was grateful for it because she managed to spot her friend in the corner of the room, covered in shadows and reading something.

He raised his head when she burst through the door and hurriedly approached him, an obvious frown on her face.

"I want a new dress." She promptly worded in his face. "Tonight."

He stared at her, quite taken aback by her unusual request.

"Alright…" He hesitantly retorted. "But why? That dress has never bothered you before."

"It bothers me now."

She was usually stubborn and she usually acted impulsively and ridiculously to get her way, so she did the least expected thing. To prove her point, she dug her arms under the folds of her dress and tried to pull it over her head until Ragamuffin quickly stood up and stopped her, right before she took off her clothes. He glared uneasily at her as he immobilized her arms, making her give a small noise in protest.

"I've got it." He spoke in annoyance. "You don't have to undress in front of me."

Lenore stopped and narrowed her eyes in thought as she looked up at him.

"Why wouldn't I? I used to undress in front of you all the time, when you were a doll."

Ragamuffin sighed.

"It's different now." He explained, appearing slightly weirded out by the fact that he was having a conversation like that with her. "I'm not a doll anymore and you're physically thirteen years old, not ten, so if someone sees you doing that in front of me… well, it's not normal."

Her face blanked and her mouth formed an 'o' as it suddenly dawned on her what Ragamuffin actually meant. Perhaps Lenore was dense most of the time, but even she wasn't oblivious to that kind of things. She blinked at him, speechless for a few moments, before she nodded quietly and backed away from him, suddenly aware of the fact that she was actually growing up and that she was living with a grown-up man under the same roof.

She felt everything was going to be really different in an odd way. Apart from the fact that her body and mind were maturing, it was Ragamuffin that was another cause of their lives' change.

Or more exactly, he wasn't a doll anymore and Lenore often seemed to forget that.

Another year passed after that night in which she chose the dark purple dress. Lenore knew she especially wanted it because Ragamuffin told her she looked pretty in it, not because she liked it too much. She didn't even know why she did that, but there was a desire to please him, which was weird, since she didn't care about Ragamuffin's opinion most of the time.

When Lenore had the body of a fourteen year old, she desperately searched for her friend in almost the entire mansion, scared and teary-eyed, barging in almost every room and shouting his name. Dizziness enveloped her and her head spun as her vision blurred.

She managed to find him in one of the rooms after all, to her relief, and she would have fallen to the floor if Ragamuffin didn't catch her right before she almost fainted. He asked her if she was alright and she could hear fright and concern in his voice, which made her smile a little, even though she was on the verge of losing her consciousness.

He didn't say anything after he saw the spot of blood on the back of her dress.

She remained perplexed because he calmed down, as opposed to Lenore who had initially freaked out terribly at the sight of it.

She gazed up at him through her half-closed eyelids and she noticed him having that hungry expression again, after almost four years. In that moment, she wasn't even scared, since she had the sensation that Ragamuffin knew exactly why she was suddenly bleeding.

"Am I dying again?" She barely murmured, tired and downhearted. Ragamuffin appeared to snap out of his specific, weird trance and he looked down on her, worry replacing the feral expression. He shook his head and sighed and Lenore knew for sure that he wasn't really keen on telling her the real cause of her illness. If it actually was an illness.

"No." He responded, somewhat restrained. "You're…" He paused and he inhaled deeply, as if it was really hard for him to mention it. "You're maturing, Lenore. You're almost a woman."

She widened her eyes a little.

"What?"

"Well, not exactly." He continued in uneasiness. "But this is…a first step." They looked at each other, a heavy tension rearing its head between them. Lenore's heartbeats slowed down and her mind suddenly cleared itself, as sudden emotions mixed inside her, since she almost realized what the blood meant.

"You have to wash yourself." Ragamuffin said, lifting her in his arms and trying to make her stand up on her own legs. Unfortunately, Lenore could barely move her limbs, let alone make the effort to walk and take a bath.

"I can't." She wearily spoke. "You do it." She brusquely closed her mouth in surprise at her own words. It had been like an instinct, because she didn't even think before she escaped those words, but it was already too late. Ragamuffin watched her like she was out of her mind, as surprise and something else flashed in his dark eyes, something that Lenore couldn't recognize.

And she had the sensation that it wasn't something good at all.

"You can't actually be serious." He spoke in a tense voice.

She weakly raised her hand and dug her fingers into the fabric of his suit, sticking to his chest like a leech.

"Yes, I am." Really, she had no idea why she was doing that, but it was like she couldn't control her body anymore. "I know…" Her mouth closed for a moment, before she opened it again. "I know it's hard for you to be around me, since I bleed, but... please, Ragamuffin."

He stared at her hard and Lenore averted her eyes uncomfortable. After a few seconds, Lenore almost thought that he wasn't going to grant her request, but he actually leaned in and put his hands on her middle, lifting her in his arms.

Everything passed as in a blur. It was surreal how easily he slipped her out of her clothes, how fast he prepared everything and Lenore had to remember again that he was a vampire.

Shivers ran under her skin when his hands touched it and Lenore closed her eyes and prepared herself for the bath.

But it didn't come.

He stopped moving her and she heard his breath become really heavy, before she opened her eyes in alarm to see his face that almost scared her. His eyes were wide and they shone in the white light of the bathroom as he twisted his features in an attempt to stop himself from something that he was going to regret.

She knew he was going mad because he saw her blood down there.

Lenore's first intention was to leave that room as soon as she could, but she was so tired and weakened that she horrifyingly realized she was at his hands.

"Don't do it, Ragamuffin." She fearfully mumbled, clinging to him. "It's just me. I know you can control yourself." She swallowed heavily when she saw that her words didn't affect him at all. Maybe the fact that she had so much trust in him wasn't so good, after all.

He suddenly turned his head to the side, avoiding the sight of her body, as he tried to calm himself down.

"I can't." He spoke through gritted teeth. Lenore saw the side of his fangs and she had the impression they were sharper than usually. "Just leave. Leave now." He almost growled the last words and Lenore practically froze in terror. She weakly flailed her legs around as she struggled to escape his arms, but, despite his earlier warning, his hold was like a trap, as if he didn't actually want to let her go.

"I'm sorry." Ragamuffin muttered, before his gaze fell on the blood from between her legs. His eyes were darker than ever and wide, almost hypnotized, which made her give a short squeak in fear. Her face turned into a sickly pale when his fingers brushed over a small drop of blood that streamed down her thigh, before he brought them to his lips. She couldn't let him do it. She couldn't let him taste her blood, because he would definitely want to eat her after that.

Her arm stretched forward and lightly grasped his sleeve, trying to pull his own hand away from his mouth.

"Don't... you'll murder me if you do it." She tremulously murmured.

He tore his gaze away from his fingers and turned it towards her terrified expression.

"Just let me taste it." He grumbled in that low, greedy voice and she remarked that he wasn't himself anymore. She wanted to scream for help as she tried to fight her way out of his strong hold, but she knew no one could actually help her right then. He was one of the most powerful beings that existed. She closed her eyes tightly as she waited for her horrible fate, expecting him to bite from her, but it didn't happen.

Lenore opened her eyelids carefully only to notice that he was trembling uncontrollably. He stood like that for a few moments, staring hungrily at her blood.

Then he put his face next to her thigh and she suddenly realized what he was actually tempted to do.

Her chest went up and down in large breaths and she leapt in shock when she felt his tongue trail up her inner thigh. An avalanche of emotions burst inside her and she quickly put her hands on the top of his head, trying to push him away, but it was like moving a rock, because he didn't budge at all.

She was scared and confused and, when he pressed his face into that spot between her legs, it felt like nothing else before. Bolts of electricity went through her body as he licked the blood and bit her lightly down there and Lenore threw her head back, yelping.

She couldn't believe what he was doing to her. She couldn't believe that someone could actually do such a thing.

She couldn't believe when her legs started shaking from the overbearing amount of feelings and sensations, which made Ragamuffin grip her thighs and steady her.

It was an incredible, new, twisted experience and she didn't even know how to handle it. Her head was spinning and she couldn't see clearly as he continued to lick and suck and bite her, and a sudden fire exploded inside her, something that she didn't even know it existed.

Moaning and panting harshly, Lenore sensed her body convulse and she suddenly screamed his name, not caring if anyone else heard them. She didn't even realize how many times she called him, how many times she screamed again and again, before she sensed his strong hands grabbing the sides of her waist and holding her in place as he buried his face even deeper.

After she came down from the high, Ragamuffin pulled his head away and raised his eyes as Lenore fell on her back and remained there, motionless and exhausted.

His gaze appeared to be wild and hazy for a few seconds, before she noticed that his pleased expression gradually turned into a horrified one, when he realized what he had done to her.

"Oh god."

…

It was worse than ever.

A few months passed, in which Ragamuffin had been cold and he had barely spoken to her after what happened between them. She wanted to make him forget, so that he would act normally around her again, but every time she approached him or even tried to talk to him, he threw her a short, dangerous look that made her recoil and back away in silent fear and desperation.

Lenore knew at first that he was only acting like that to protect her from himself, even though, after some time, her mind became so tangled in retained anger and sorrow that she almost believed he did those on purpose because he despised her.

She was aware that it was only in her head, but she couldn't shake off that cold feeling. The feeling that Ragamuffin hated her.

Lenore became so twisted and infuriated by his avoidance and dark glares that she started to act irrationally- even more irrationally than usually- so she began leaving the mansion, hoping that she would anger and worry him and that he would come after her, if she prolonged her absences.

But even she couldn't roam alone through the town that much, because she got bored eventually – and scared, nonetheless, which was weird, since she hadn't been afraid before, as a ten year old kid.

After more than a year, Lenore almost got used to his coldness. She almost got used to the fact that they weren't friends anymore, even though it felt like she wasn't alive right then. Even when she had been literally dead, she had felt more alive.

She was so broken and depressed that she started spending every day locked in her bedroom, under her sheets, staring at the walls or crying at times.

The worst part was that she couldn't think about anything else, because he had constantly been on her mind since that night. She yearned for his touch again, she wanted so much to hug him and hold him and spend every minute with him.

She wanted to find out how it felt to kiss him and Lenore knew she became deeply infatuated.

Her body asked for another experience like that and she had weird thoughts regarding the two of them, thoughts that surprised her because they wouldn't have normally passed through her mind.

It was one morning when she woke up in a pool of sweat and the place between her legs ached, so she couldn't hold it any longer and used her own hand to repeat that experience. It wasn't nearly as good as Ragamuffin, but it satisfied her to an extent.

Lenore felt a little embarrassed after that, when she thought about it, but she at least relieved some of the built up stress.

There were days and weeks and maybe months during which she fell into such a deep depression that she barely left her room just to provide herself some food and to go to the bathroom occasionally.

She didn't even make the difference between night and day because dark curtains covered her bedroom windows.

Lenore felt tired and sick and she wanted to see him so bad that she almost prepared herself to leave the room one time, just to look for him. She gave up right before she touched the door's knob, since she knew that her attempts would be useless, because Ragamuffin wouldn't want to see her, so she eventually withdrew to her bed and lay there, her chest trembling from the hurtful cries.

After many hours of sleep, she sensed movement inside her room and she slowly opened her eyes to see him at the door, watching her. She blinked a few times, unsure if it was a dream or not, even though she convinced herself it wasn't after he approached her bed and sat on the edge, next to her.

Lenore noted worry and sadness clouding his eyes. She wanted so much to be angry at him, she at least wanted to look like she was, but she couldn't.

Instead, she was aware that she just looked deplorable.

"Lenore, what have you done to yourself?" His tone was filled with sorrow and Lenore realized that he probably suffered as much as she did. He took her hand into his and Lenore's heart started beating faster.

"Do you hate me?" She murmured weakly. Her fingers tried to clench his into a tight grasp, but she barely had any strength, so she only ended up in lightly pressing their hands together. Ragamuffin gazed at her and continued the gesture, twining their fingers.

"No." He exhaled slowly, bitterness present in his voice. "I hate myself for what I did to you." Lenore felt her chest swell as a wave of affection washed over her. "I couldn't bear the idea of being around you after what happened. I was so angry with myself and I…" He appeared conflicted for a moment and Lenore couldn't stand it anymore.

She reached up for his neck and encircled it with her arms, slowly bringing him above her. Her breath came faster and the nervous twisting in her stomach shot up her spine when she felt him engulfing her into a hug. He took her entirely in his arms, because, despite her growth, he still was much bigger than her.

Lenore brushed her cheek against his and her lips were suddenly tempted to press into his neck, right below his jaw line.

"I liked it." She whispered.

Ragamuffin slightly pulled away to give her an intent, bewildered stare and Lenore's pounding heart fluttered to her throat.

"What?"

She turned her head to the side as her face began to heat up, before she looked up very slowly, imploringly, her lip between her teeth.

"It was amazing and I think..." She paused and swallowed when she noticed that he froze, his expression torn between apprehension and surprise. "I think we should do it again."

Ragamuffin looked like he could not think of a single way to respond to that. He just gaped for a few moments before he backed away from their hug and averted his eyes, staring blankly ahead, leaving Lenore with a sharp pang of disappointment in her chest.

"You have no idea what you're talking about." His voice was void of any emotion. There was just an invisible tension that seemed to grow more and more between them. She furrowed her brow.

"Yes, I do." Lenore retorted, slightly frustrated. "I do, I want it, I really-"

"It wasn't meant to be like that!" He snapped, his eyes filled with fury and grief, and Lenore felt the breath knocked from her, stricken by his behavior.

She knew she had annoyed him many times in the past, but never like that. She clutched at her chest, stunned beyond all reason at his voice. Her lips quivered as pain flickered in her eyes.

Ragamuffin softened to an extent and shook his head in defeat.

"I'm your friend and I take care of you, Lenore." He looked briefly disgusted with himself. "That day I just went out of my mind when I saw your blood. I didn't even think about what I was doing to you in those moments. I was just feeding myself." He looked at Lenore to see her downhearted face, her gaze that dropped unfocused, unseeing to her lap.

"What you actually want is …" He covered his face with his palm, sighing deeply. "I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you." He suddenly turned to her again. "It's sexual."

Lenore pursed her lips as she raised her head, a raging fire burning in her eyes. She wanted so much to make him understand, she wanted to tell him that she really wanted that, that she wanted to be with him, that he wasn't just a best friend to her anymore, that he was more.

That she wanted him to be so much, much  _more_.

"I know it's sexual!" She couldn't believe the anger that suddenly overcame her, giving her the strength to lift herself and approach him. "And I want it to be like that!"

Ragamuffin widened his eyes and he looked at a loss to understand, to believe.

He shook his head, like he was refusing to comprehend what he was hearing.

"No." He spoke stiffly. "You don't know what you're saying."

She clenched her fists, digging her nails into the skin of her palm into barely retained anger and desperation.

"You think I'm dumb, don't you?" She said softly, a vague, suppressed resignation filling her voice. "You always thought that, Ragamuffin. Stupid, little Lenore." She watched him bitterly. "Maybe I'm stupid, but I'm not little anymore." Her eyes flashed wildly as she stared into his. "And I know what I want."

They gazed at each other in silence and Lenore felt the warmth beneath her bellybutton intensify as she looked into his dark eyes. She suddenly desired to feel him, to feel his hand on her, so she tentatively reached and slowly grasped his hand into her smaller one, guiding it near her lap.

She hovered for a moment and looked up at him, wanting to see his reaction, but Ragamuffin just stared intensely, his eyes boring into her and making her feel slightly shy. Her gaze fell on their connected hands, before she carried on the gesture and brought his hand between her legs.

It happened so fast that she didn't even have the chance to react. It was like he lost his entire control for a moment.

His arm sneaked around her waist and brought her closer, placing her on his lap. Lenore drew a sharp breath in when he pressed his palm between her thighs. She parted her legs and brought them over his sides as she leaned in and rested her head on his chest, breathing heavily.

Then Ragamuffin paused for a brief moment and his hand remained there, on that spot, motionless and teasing. He was probably fighting with himself again and Lenore realized he was intending to pull his hand away, because the pressure of his skin became lighter and lighter, until she didn't feel anything but a throbbing and an intense frustration.

She whined a little and lifted her face to gape at him pleadingly as her hand reached back and grabbed his, trying to make him touch her there again.

"Don't, please, don't…" She mumbled deliriously as she moved her hips against the front of his pants, looking for more friction. He tried to stifle a groan as she continued to frantically grind on his lap and his hand involuntarily went under her nightgown again, resting between her thighs.

"Why are you doing this?" His mouth grumbled against her cheek while Lenore pushed herself into his hand. She felt her face extremely hot as she unconsciously rubbed her cheek against his, her eyes closed.

"I want…I want to…I want you…" She spoke softly in a hushed tone. They stood there, faces pressed together, before Ragamuffin slightly drew back, making Lenore open her eyes and stare into his.

"You're Lenore…" He muttered as if it was difficult for him to accept what was happening. He captured her cheek into his palm and she blushed harder than ever as a multitude of emotions whirled inside her. "I can't do this to you." His words made her heart soar and her gaze fell on his mouth that was really close.

She swallowed before she impulsively puckered her lips and touched his lightly.

"But I want you to do this to me." She uttered affectionately and it was enough to trigger him.

Her breath was stolen by his mouth that covered her own and her pleased sounds echoed in the room as he began caressing her. His lips were soft yet firm as his mouth moved over hers and the kiss became deeper. Letting her mouth move on its own accord, it dropped, allowing her lips to part and his tongue to slide within.

Lenore gasped then moaned when his fingers stroked and pushed in and out of her, before she broke their kiss to burry her face into his chest, trying to control another broken sound rising in her throat. The roughness of his fingertips and his gentle touches caused her body to arch against him. His mouth fell on her bare shoulder, biting lightly, and his hand went faster, making her escape cries in pleasure.

"Damn it, Lenore, what you make me do…" His low voice muttered on her skin, giving her shivers. She pushed herself harder into his hand and she suddenly realized it was the only thing that separated the place between her legs from the front of his lap. A sense of urgency engulfed her when her body asked for more of him. She wanted to feel him.

She  _really_  wanted to feel him.

Her shaking hand fell on the front of his trousers and her fingers started to fumble with his pants' buttons, but Ragamuffin's other hand suddenly grabbed her wrist and stopped her.

"No." His tone was dark and husky and Lenore knew he was on the verge of breaking. She just needed a little more and she could make him forget about his moral sense.

She raised her head, flushing, and Ragamuffin watched her face contorting pleadingly as she leaned and kissed next to his lips.

"Please, Ragamuffin." Arousal grew in her more and more before she lifted her face again and kissed him fully on the lips, panting heavily. "Mm, please." Then she kissed him again and again, escaping small pleas between their lips. She heard him give a short growl in lust before he reluctantly withdrew his hand, letting her unbutton his trousers with small, trembling fingers.

She waited for a moment and bit her lip in anticipation, bracing herself. She couldn't believe they were actually doing it. That was closer than she had ever dreamed of, and more than she had ever imagined. It was different from what she had initially had in mind and much, much better.

Lenore closed her eyes and breathed his name quietly as he thrust up against her and groaned, pushing into her. He lowered his head down and rested his mouth against her collarbone as he dug his teeth into her skin for the second time. Longing was building uncontrollably in her chest and spreading everywhere, everywhere he touched her. It hurt a little and she gave a small cry, which made Ragamuffin stop and back away to look into her face.

"Are you alright?" He asked, even as he struggled to keep his breathing even. She looked up at him and nodded shakily, before she pressed her lips to his, her eyes silently begging him to go further.

His moment of lucidity was then gone and his dark, lustful stare pierced her as his hands slowly slid lower from her waist, until they reached her rear, tightening, bringing her even closer. He lifted her, before he slowly pushed her back down, which made her mewl softly and Ragamuffin groan through his clenched jaw. Her arms rested on his back as he repeated his movements, reaching deeper and deeper within her and their breaths got heavy as they kept going in a slow pace.

Then she needed more. She had never imagined such feelings, such sensations and she suddenly forgot about her composure, the waves of lust going through her like a drug. A sharp pulsing pleasure throbbed between her legs, in her lips, in her thighs, greater than anything she'd felt before and her fingers dug into his back, embracing and pressing into him. She whimpered, moaned against his mouth and he started going harder and faster, groaning and twisting his tongue around hers into a hungry lip-lock.

She gasped for air as he moved faster, thrusting harder and harder until her tightening pulse grew uncontrollably.

"Ragamuffin…" The volume of her cries rose dramatically and her hand tangled in his hair as she buried her face in his shoulder.

Then it all sharpened and she climaxed, sensing the fire explode inside her, and his mouth growling in her ear made that blissful feeling last longer than ever. She cried out loudly as she felt him release himself inside her, before she collapsed on him, tired, her eyes barely open.

They stood like that, breathing heavily against each other and listening to the quiet that surrounded them. His arm held her waist tightly, then he lifted her, pulling himself out of her and making her whimper.

"I'm sorry." He kissed her forehead and took her into his arms. Lenore curled and nuzzled into him as he engulfed her into his embrace. Her mind was swimming, her heart was thundering madly in her chest and, even though his skin was cold, she felt warm and fuzzy because being in his arms was incredible and perfect. It was everything she wanted.

Her pulse skipped when his lips touched her hair and she tried to imprint the feeling on her memory. Her affection for him was overwhelming and her desire flared again, deep in her core.

She gaped at the clothes that still separated them and her hand suddenly rested on his suit jacket, her fingers pressing into the material.

Ragamuffin looked down at her and she raised her head, sharing his gaze.

"I want more." She whispered in a half commanding, half pleading voice, staring intently. He watched her, strained and bewildered.

"Lenore…" His tone had a vague, warning note and she touched his strong hands, bringing them beneath her nightgown. Lenore lifted herself and stuck her mouth to his, breathless and impatient.

She felt lightheaded and let out a breath of satisfaction when he gave in and put his hands on her bare back, under her cloth.

Then everything went amazing again and she knew there was no way back. She knew they were completely connected when their bodies turned and twisted around each other between the sheets, on the soft mattress, and she was aware they could never return to their usual, old friendship.

And Lenore knew for sure that she didn't want to.

…

One evening, a week after they had made love for the first time, Lenore woke up, naked and dazed, in her dark room and looked around her, expecting him to be near her on the bed. She blinked a few times and noticed that the place next to her was empty, so she stood up and took her nightgown. Her bare feet touched the floor, before she silently went out the door and walked on the hall and down the stairs, only to hear voices in the living room.

She stopped behind the wall that separated the main room from the rest of the mansion and listened intently to the conversation that Ragamuffin and Pooty were having.

"So, how is Lenore feeling?" It was Pooty the one who spoke. "I haven't seen her out of her room lately. I hope she is not too hurt." His voice had a distinct pang of sarcasm and Lenore remarked that Ragamuffin noticed it as well, because he paused for a moment before he responded.

"Why would she be hurt?" He tentatively inquired.

"Oh, I don't know…" Pooty trailed off. "Maybe because you do her hard, five or six times a day."

Ragamuffin suddenly choked in shock at the demon hunter's words and Lenore felt her face burning. Pooty always had the tendency to be straightforward about everything, even in the most embarrassing situations. She thought it was funny most of the time, but there were occasions when even she was taken aback by his unusual language.

Ragamuffin coughed a few times, trying to regain his voice.

"What makes you think that?" He grumbled, his voice gruff and uncomfortable.

"Well, I don't think the 'oh, Ragamuffin' and 'harder, Ragamuffin' screams I constantly hear every day come from the fact that she rides you pony style for hours in her room." Amusement filled his voice when Ragamuffin remained silent.

"Don't worry." Pooty carried on. "I always knew she was your little pumpkin pie."

"That's none of your goddamn business." Ragamuffin snapped in annoyance. Pooty gave a long, heavy sigh.

"I know it's not supposed to be my business, but I don't think I can stand other Ragamuffins around here." Pooty said flatly.

Lenore frowned in confusion as she felt a twist in her stomach.

"Living with you is enough of a challenge to me." Pooty continued ironically.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Ragamuffin asked, slightly infuriated and perplexed. Lenore knew Pooty and Ragamuffin weren't on excellent terms and they used to annoy each other constantly, but there was a feeling that Pooty wasn't actually joking this time. She had the terrible certitude that he was talking about something she didn't like at all.

"I'm talking about the freaky vampire spawn that you two can produce." Pooty spoke dead serious.

She suddenly felt the blood drain from her face.

She froze as if someone slapped her. She almost thought she forgot to breathe, before a sharp intake of air stung her lungs and woke her up from the temporary shock that she had received at the hunter's statement.

Lenore noticed that it was quiet,  _too_  quiet, so she walked lightly and entered the room, revealing herself.

Pooty turned his head towards her, but Ragamuffin was staring blankly ahead, not even moving. He was paler than ever, which was odd, since Lenore didn't think it was possible.

"Ragamuffin?" She murmured timidly, although he didn't even seem to hear her. He kept staring at the air and Lenore looked at Pooty. "Is it true?" She inquired, weak and shaken. "Can I actually…" She looked down, feeling awkward. "Can I actually have his babies?" The way she had asked the question made her feel slightly ridiculous and childish.

There was an hesitant pause.

"Yeah, you can put it that way."

"But how? How do you know this?" Lenore asked, sensing an uneasiness grow in her stomach. She saw Ragamuffin coming to his senses, because he started shaking his head.

"No, it's not true." He spoke with slight desperation in his voice. He appeared frustrated and almost angry. "I'm a vampire. Vampires can't breed."

Pooty exhaled impatiently.

"Yes, you do. Your kind, at least. I studied your species in Hell's classes and I found out that certain vampires did have spawn." Pooty scratched his bucket face in thought. "Although the children can really vary in your peculiar case, since the blonde girl is human."

Lenore knitted her brow.

"What does that mean?"

"Well, the kids can either be human or complete vampires." Pooty said, turning towards Ragamuffin who stared deadpan at him. "Also, the pregnancy develops much faster. So if you really are knocked out, it'll be visible in about a week."

Lenore felt a little sick at the hunter's words. She noticed Ragamuffin throw her a concerned look out of the corner of the eye.

"Even though I believe there is a very big chance of pregnancy in your case, because you are sixteen years old and the fertility is quite high at this age." He stopped and stared at them with hollow, black eyes.

Her stomach contents swayed as dizziness enveloped her head. She approached Ragamuffin, leaned into him and her heartbeat fastened when he gently grabbed her waist and pulled her in his lap.

"I don't know if I can do it, Ragamuffin." She anxiously murmured, resting her head on his chest. He lightly kissed the top of her head and wrapped his arms around her.

"Don't worry, you won't have to." He buried his face into her hair. "You're not…" He stopped and stared at the air, frowning in thought. "Pregnant." The corners of his mouth curled down as if the word let a bitter taste behind.

Pooty snorted in derisiveness.

"Please, you had at least twenty sexual encounters in the last week."

Ragamuffin threw him a deathly glare as Lenore flinched in restlessness and distress. She gazed at the empty space as she fell into deep thought, her imagination going haywire again.

Pictures with her and some unknown kids passed before her eyes. She looked older, much more mature and a constantly annoyed Ragamuffin was next to them, tiredness adorning his young features.

That was when she realized that she was getting older, but Ragamuffin was always going to look like that. He was always going to look like he was in his early twenties, whereas she would probably get old and rugged and then…she would die and never come back.

An icy, invisible knife slashed her chest, stopping her breathing for a moment.

For a moment, she actually believed the fact that the witch gave her life destroyed her entire existence and probably Ragamuffin's as well.

That meant he had been right. The witch had only intended to destroy their lives.

If she had remained a child, they wouldn't have confronted all those problems. They wouldn't have been in a relationship and they would have remained what they had always been.

Two best friends.

Lenore furrowed her brow at the thought. She couldn't even conceive anymore the idea of her and Ragamuffin being  _just_  best friends. She loved him too much to think about him like that. She knew that she wouldn't have felt about him like that, if she didn't grow up in the first place, but she was glad it happened.

She wasn't going to let the witch's spell get in their way. There had to be a solution and she was going to find it.

Her determination began fading away in the next days. Tension filled the air every time one of them brought the baby subject – particularly Lenore-, so she started to feel depressed again as they waited for the inevitable to show up. They didn't even make physical contact that often, just once in a while, when she couldn't stand it anymore and hugged or kissed him randomly.

Even Pooty sounded filled with regret each time he spoke to one of them, which saddened Lenore even more. If Pooty, who didn't care about anything, acted like that, then they were indeed in a very unfortunate situation.

In spite of her vague hope, that she wasn't perhaps pregnant, Lenore woke up in the seventh morning to sense a slight uncomfortable lump in her belly. She looked down, only to see what they all knew after all. The swell.

An abundance of emotions drowned her in that moment. Fear, anger, joy, concern jumbled inside her, gathering in the pit of her stomach and threatening to come out. She ran faster than she thought she was capable of, slammed the bathroom door and threw everything into the toilet, as an almost unbearable pain rolled inside her head, making her dizzy. She couldn't see clearly and she barely had any strength as she lay there, on the edge of the bathtub, her forehead resting on the cool marble.

There were sounds and maybe voices. She heard Ragamuffin's voice calling her at one point, but she couldn't even open her eyes, that was how tired she felt.

She had expected that. They had all expected that. But the confirmation, the vivid truth, right there, in front of her eyes, was like a hit. A painful, suffocating hit.

How was she supposed to cope with that? She, herself, was just a bigger child. Ragamuffin constantly felt the need to remind her that, every time he got annoyed with her ridiculous, dimwitted behavior, even after she grew up. Even after they initiated their romantic relationship.

She couldn't become a mother. The idea had never passed through her mind, in her entire existence. It was absurd, unreal.

Denial flooded her to such an extent that she found another explanation for the swell in her stomach. She got fatter. That was all. Lenore snorted as her hand lightly ghosted over her belly, exhaling loudly.

Her eyes fluttered open to see Ragamuffin's face looking down at her in worry, which made her give him a tired smile. They were lying on something soft and warm and Lenore realized they were in her bed.

"I got fat." She muttered jokingly. He didn't smile. Instead, he closed his eyes for a moment, sighing, probably trying to be patient with her, before he opened them again. The sorrow in them almost blew her away.

"Damn it, Lenore." He spoke lowly, and she could hear a repressed anger in his tone. She didn't know who and what he was angry at. At himself, at her. At the fact that they had committed numerous mistakes and that they ended up in that terrifying, tangled situation.

"I'm sorry." She murmured, looking into his eyes. She felt tears attempting to fall down her cheeks, but she refrained from doing it. That was the last thing they needed right then. He saw that and raised his hand to caress her face, before he bent over and pressed their lips together into a kiss.

"It's not your fault." He soothed her.

"Yes, it is." She mumbled, her voice cracking. "I made you do it." She sniffed. "I made you sleep with me."

"Cut it out." He spoke, irritation scratching at his words. "If I didn't drink your blood when you were fourteen…" He shook his head and turned his gaze away, looking at the wall. "That goddamn witch."

They remained quiet, falling into a silent agreement. Her hand started playing with his fingers, before he clasped hers into a tight, loving hold.

"What am I supposed to do with two kids in my care?" He asked out loud as his gaze fell on her features again. Lenore frowned and looked up at him questioningly. She noticed some sort of slight mock in his words.

"What do you mean by 'two kids'?" She inquired, releasing his hand.

"Well, there's the baby…" He paused. "And you."

Indignation welled up in her chest and her face turned beet red under his amused gaze.

She huffed and her hand hit him furiously in the chest, before she rolled around and turned her back to him. She was aware that it should be a joke, but she knew Ragamuffin actually believed those words more than he was showing. And, sadly, she knew they were true, as well.

She felt his arms engulfing her form and bringing her body closer to his. Lenore let her head fall on his chest, cuddling into him.

"It will be alright." He spoke softly. "We'll take care of the child." He put his palm on her stomach and Lenore instinctively rested her hand over his. "Our child."

She felt that warmth again. That pleasant warmth that spurted inside her when he was there to comfort and hold her. It was difficult for both of them, but he always found a way to make things easier. Or, at least, to make them look easier.

"Our child." She repeated as the dreams veiled her mind into a peaceful sleep.

…

It appeared that the well known fact was true: it was easier said than done.

Days passed after that. And weeks.

And she felt worse and worse.

Lenore started gathering knowledge about pregnancy and babies – well, Ragamuffin actually read to her from various books, while she was stuffing herself with all kinds of food- , but she at least pretended she was interested, so that he would think she was more mature.

It really irritated her that she couldn't even move well due to that enormous stomach, which made her look like she had a gigantic balloon under her dresses. And the weirdest part was that she became grumpier and easy to annoy. That discovery annoyed her even more which turned it into an endless cycle of bad moods.

Which brought her and Ragamuffin rounds and rounds of misunderstandings, bickering and fighting.

Lenore knew he was really trying hard to be composed and passive around her. He was trying hard to help and support her, in spite of the fact that she was overbearing, pretentious and bad-tempered. But everyone had his breaking point.

If he ignored her before, when she was younger and wanted to provoke him into having silly arguments with her about ridiculous subjects, well… she could say she finally managed to drive him over the edge and make him say things that were out of place even for him.

It was one evening when she suddenly felt the strange urge to do it again. That desire was quite sudden and not easy to fulfill since she was pregnant and hadn't felt it in more than five months.

"I want to do it." Lenore spoke and her own authoritarian voice surprised her more than usually. Ragamuffin looked up from his book, his expression already suggesting that he was fed up with her. That gave her some sort of odd satisfaction because it reminded her of the times when she was a kid and enjoyed annoying him with her behavior.

"Do what?" He asked deadpan.

There was a slight embarrassment that almost stopped her from saying it out loud, because she had never done it before. Every time they had made love, none of them asked for it or specifically requested it. It just…happened.

"You know…" She mumbled and fidgeted nervously, averting her eyes. He sighed.

"No, I don't. And I'm sure it's something absurd or impossible or nerve-wrecking just like usually. Why don't you just occupy your time with something and leave me in peace for a few moments?" He grumbled harshly.

That was just the usual Ragamuffin. Under normal circumstances, she wouldn't have even cared that he spoke to her like that. He told her worse things and she didn't give a damn most of the time. He called her 'stupid', 'weird' and other things that were probably supposed to make her realize how much of an idiot she was.

She didn't usually care because she retorted to those with a chain of much more severe insults.

To Lenore's frustration and confusion, she actually felt really offended by his words that caused some strange reactions in her body. It determined her to dramatize and overreact about it. It also made her want to tear up.

"You're an insensitive bastard!" She snapped, quite affected. He raised his eyebrows, taken aback by her lack of witty insults and by her regression to a dependant, moody female. Lenore snapped her mouth shut and turned her head away, trying to appear upset with him.

"Please stop with all these scenes." Ragamuffin spoke, tired and annoyed. "I think you should know by now that I'm not going to let myself engrossed in these childish schemes of yours." His frown became more visible when she refused to look at him. "Just grow up already."

Lenore almost boiled when she heard his snarky reply. It was like she couldn't recognize herself anymore, since she would never lose her temper due to Ragamuffin's words. She had never even given importance to them before.

"I'm almost seventeen! I'm not supposed to be a grown up yet!" She shouted angrily.

"Yes, you're supposed to be a grown up since you're about to give birth." He grunted.

"I wouldn't have to give birth if  _you_  didn't impregnate me!"

She didn't think she could hear the birds from outside, after the silence that fell in the entire living room. Lenore realized then that she truly could, after all.

Ragamuffin was petrified, his face impassive and stony. She bit her lip and avoided his hard stare that made her feel guilty for what she had said, before she hugged herself downcast as her gaze rested on the floor in shame.

"I didn't mean to-"

"No, you're right." He interrupted her coldly. His voice was empty, there was no trace of emotion in it, as if he wasn't himself anymore. "I've really done one of the greatest mistakes in my entire existence when I first touched you like that."

The air became unbreathable. It was like everything was falling to pieces when it dawned on her what he was about to say. Her nails sharply dug into her palm, still hoping that he wouldn't say it, but something inside her was starting to crush, to break.

"I won't continue this with you, after the baby is born. We'll end this." He stated and, to her, it sounded too cruel.

Lenore's skin turned cold. She turned white with a look of fearful, panicked disbelief.

"W-what, what do you m-mean?" She mumbled, her chest tightening painfully. She didn't have to ask again, since she knew what Ragamuffin actually meant the first time.

But she couldn't believe it. She couldn't believe that he wanted that after everything they'd been through.

He couldn't stand her anymore. He couldn't stand her domineering, distasteful, difficult character. She was still a kid, just like he had said it so many times. A bratty one, nonetheless.

And he didn't need a brat next to him. He didn't need her.

He had to stand her for so many years. He always took care of her and helped her, despite that she had never shown him any kind of gratitude. Even more, she had tortured him and turned his days into nightmares, countless times.

And now, he was surely sick and tired of her. Being her friend was bad enough, but being more than that, being her… what? Lover? Boyfriend?

It was probably a living hell.

"We'll take care of the child. But I won't touch you anymore." Ragamuffin spoke rigidly. "It's for your own good."

Her mind went numb. She felt sick from the pain. She could not draw enough air into her lungs, could not think through the mental torment.

She opened her mouth to give him the answer, to tell him a lie, to tell him that she agreed, that she was ok with it, because she didn't want to show him how much she hanged on to him. How much she depended on him, how much she needed him. She didn't want to look or sound weak.

The anger, the frustration, the grief inside made her say something else entirely, something that she knew she could not repair. Something horrendous that she knew she was going to regret.

"Go to hell." She tried to sound confident but knew her shaking voice just sounded devastated.

There was a barely noticeable flicker in his eyes. A flicker that suggested he was dejected and hurt as well.

He shook his head and stood up, before he went out the door and left her alone, in her own misery and silent tears.

…

Someone had been fervently knocking at her bedroom door for a while, but she didn't have the strength to get up and open it.

She just stood there, face planted in the soaked, tear stained pillow, legs curled under her, her hands lazily rubbing her stomach, trying to calm the baby that was constantly moving inside her. She felt hunger clawing at her, since she hadn't eaten in almost two days, because she was too busy to suffer and cry for hours and hours.

She hurt so badly that she lost every small impulse to leave that bed, despite that her body continuously asked for food.

The fear for her baby's safety woke her up in the middle of the night and almost made her go to the fridge, but she renounced after she remembered that Ragamuffin was especially active at night. That meant he was roaming through the house and she definitely didn't want to see him.

"Open up, Lenore!" Pooty yelled from the other side of the door, knocking loudly. Lenore had the feeling that he wasn't going to give up too soon, so she dazedly stood up and blinked a few times, accustoming to the white spots of light that blinded her for a few seconds, due to the sudden movement.

When her feet touched the floor, she noticed that she moved with a greater difficulty than two days ago and that she felt heavier, which was quite odd, since the baby didn't usually gain in weight so fast.

She fumbled through the dark until she touched the knob and weakly opened it, letting the hall's light envelop her and a small part of the bedroom. Pooty burst inside and she backed away, letting him in, before she closed the door after them.

"What is it?" She grumbled in a ragged, fade voice. She raised a hand to her head, disoriented. "I'm not really in the mood for a girl talk right now, Pooty." She mumbled sarcastically.

Pooty's trident lightly stung the skin on her bare ankle, making her yelp and leap in surprise.

"Ouch! What was that for?" She screeched in outrage and indignation.

"That's for your foolish attitude in the last two days." He promptly worded, in a voice that made Lenore feel like she was being scolded. "You're  _huge_. You're not allowed to deprive the freakish product of conception that you have there-" At that, he pointed his trident to her belly-"from nourishment, especially if you have the sensation of hunger."

She huffed and crossed her arms, frowning.

"Well, I can't go out there because I'll risk meeting Ragamuffin and I don't want to see him." She spoke furiously.

Pooty slapped his own bucket head, grumbling something- probably something that insulted both her and Ragamuffin- under his breath.

"The baby is more important than your stupid relationship." He said in exasperation. "Listen here, blonde kid." He continued in a serious, dutiful tone and Lenore sensed an unease gnawing at her gut. "If you want to keep that goddamn baby you have to ignore everything else for the moment and focus on it. So forget about that idiot of a vampire and take care of yourself."

Lenore bit her lip as she noticed Pooty fixing her swollen stomach with his eyes, before she followed his gaze and looked down as well.

"I don't think there is much time left until the birth anyway." He stated thoughtfully.

Lenore enlarged her eyes, her heartbeats brusquely intensifying at the news.

"What? But I'm only in the fifth month!"

"Why do you think your pregnancy was visible right after the first week?" He obviously questioned. "This is not like any other human pregnancy. It's very much likely that you have a vampire growing in you."

They remained silent, each one preoccupied by the same problem. Lenore was somewhat confused regarding how vampire pregnancies worked, but she didn't question further. She just hoped that everything was going to be alright for her and her baby, that he or she was going to be healthy…well, usual motherly worries.

Some sort of pride gathered in the depths of her mind at the realization. She had motherly instincts. Lenore smiled to herself and she almost wanted to go and rub it in Ragamuffin's face, because he always told her that she wasn't ready to be a mother yet.

She silently patted her own belly when the small being lightly kicked her insides.

"At least now I know that I won't need Ragamuffin anymore." She spoke stubbornly. "I have my own little Ragamuffin here." She smiled wider as Pooty shook his head.

"You're hopeless." He told her ironically. Lenore pursed her lips and furrowed her brow, feeling slightly insulted by Pooty's statement.

"What?" She asked defensive.

"You can't last one week without him." Pooty sighed, turning around and intending to leave the room. Anger and revolt accumulated inside her as she clenched her fists and twisted her features in frustration. Frustration partly due to Pooty's sayings and partly due to the fact that she got into one of her bad moods. Again.

"Yes, I can!" She snapped at him. "I can take care of myself! I don't need him!" She stopped and frowned for a moment, as the words sounded extremely familiar. She then realized that she sounded like the abandoned, pregnant women from the cliché shows she and Ragamuffin always laughed at. Which made her feel even more stupid.

Her behavior was getting more and more ridiculous and those furious outbursts were starting to get on her own nerves as well.

She suddenly noticed that she remained alone in the room, which meant Pooty had left it before she even finished her retort. The door was open again and the vague hall light was falling on her, making her bedroom appear surreal.

She was angry. She was mad at everyone and everything and she couldn't stop those negative emotions and that was why she got angrier and angrier.

Because Pooty was right. Because she couldn't manage without Ragamuffin. And not just because she was head over heels for him– yes, she realized that she was, indeed-but he was also the one who supported her from all points of view. The one who took care of her, saved her, and provided her everything that was necessary for survival. He was practically her guardian. And he had always been, even as a doll.

She wasn't capable to carry on her life by herself. And many facts were clearly proving it.

Like the one that she suddenly discovered she wasn't even able to wash herself in the next few days because the baby had grown so big, she couldn't even stand up properly. Its weight weakened her terribly, exhausting her, especially if she tried to move on her own. That meant she had to lie on a bed, on a couch or even the floor if her body gave up under the heavy weight, right in the middle of the house.

Which led to her depriving the baby from food. Again. Because the effort to go to the kitchen to eat something was too great.

She was helpless, she had to ask for someone's aid and she knew Ragamuffin was the only one around who had the possibility to offer it, but she didn't want him. She was obstinate and still furious with him. She had to prove that she could handle herself without his help. And Pooty didn't have the strength to carry her because he was just an animate two-bucket object.

The only solution was to tell Pooty to search for someone else's help.

"Go find someone. I think I'm going to die here." Lenore mumbled tired, while she was lying on the floor, in front of the bedroom, her stomach growing right in front of her eyes. She barely got up in that evening, but she collapsed before she reached the staircase. Lenore was somewhat thankful for that, since she might have tripped if she did it right on the stairs.

"I can't." Pooty replied decided. "You have no choice. You have to call Ragamuffin."

Lenore dug her fingers into the carpet, infuriated.

"I don't want him." She said tensely, through her teeth. "Just find someone already. It really hurts."

"Don't you get it? You have to give birth in this house, kid." He spoke in a grave, somber tone. "If someone finds out you're bringing a vampire to this world, you're done. You and the baby. You'll end up experiments in a laboratory." He stretched his metal arm and rested it on her distended, weird shaped stomach. "I can help you with this, but you have to call the vampire to carry you and place you on something soft."

"N-no." She gritted her teeth harder, drops streaming down her face, as a sharp ache passed through the lower part of her body. "N-no, I…" She couldn't bear it more than that. A groan of pain escaped her mouth when the baby hit her from the inside, harder than ever. Her arms circled her own middle as she curled on the floor, the ache becoming stronger and stronger. Tears flooded her cheeks, tears from pain, from frustration, from anger, from the pride that hurt, because it made her believe she would step on her own dignity if she called Ragamuffin. In that messy tangle of feelings and physical anguish, the pride was still the most powerful.

She couldn't. She couldn't show her weakness. Even though that thought was quite ridiculous since she was visibly squirming in agony right there, on the floor.

The pain was making her lose her mind and her sense, so her sudden screams shook the entire house, frighteningly hitting the walls. Her whole being felt like it was being ripen apart, like an invisible force was tearing at her flesh, cutting her into pieces. She couldn't think. She couldn't breath. Everything was like a swirl of maddening colors, and images passed before her eyes, rapidly, one after another. Every possible emotion came into existence, inside her, and she wanted to hit, to bite, to laugh, to cry, to yell at everything that surrounded her in that moment.

She clung onto something or someone at some point, and she sensed firm arms around her trembling form, as a scared, almost desperate voice talked into her ear.

She knew it was him, he was there for her, just like he had always been. Which frustrated her, because she had to accept his help, because she couldn't even be mad at him anymore, because the efforts she made to prove she could manage without him were useless.

Because she couldn't.

She was conflicted, she was a person in one moment and another in the next one. She couldn't control her actions. Lenore wasn't completely certain, but she believed she forcefully, desperately kissed him, before she slapped him, screaming all kinds of profanities at him.

There was chaos, complete, mind-numbing chaos, and she could hear Ragamuffin and Pooty yelling at each other in that disaster. She yelled something too, but the overbearing agony was choking her, making her swallow her words.

Then it stopped. Every sense disappeared, she couldn't hear, she couldn't see, she couldn't feel anything, which made her think she fainted and maybe she did. She didn't know for sure. It was completely quiet for some time, before the deafness was broken by one of the loveliest sounds she had ever heard. In all truth, it was an irritating, ear-scratching cry, but that strange, unusual, motherly instinct resurfaced again, shifting and growing inside.

And she knew she couldn't be the bratty, immature, little girl, ever again.

…

"Remember when Ragamuffin was a doll and you planted him in the backyard because you wanted to grow little Ragamuffins?" Pooty asked amused.

She remembered it very well. She remembered the absurd things she committed as a kid, day after day, the torment that she put Ragamuffin through, when he had been a doll. Strangely enough, she quite missed that doll. If she thought better, the perspective was indeed weird. A little girl who had a doll, that turned into a vampire, with whom she had a child later. It almost sounded like a fantasy story, which made her want to laugh.

"Now you can  _actually_  say you have your own little Ragamuffin."

The sky was clear that night, so they took an unusual, short trip outside, in the vaguely illuminated garden. It was unusual because they hadn't really spent time in the backyard since Lenore was a ten years old, dead girl.

That meant more than seven years ago.

She snorted and smiled as she watched Ragamuffin holding a miniature version of himself. They were having some sort of picnic – well, only Lenore and Pooty were having it, since they were the only ones who consumed normal food- two months after the event that brought them another resident in the old mansion.

"Yeah, but he has my eyes. So he's not just completely made of Ragamuffin." She spoke in indignation.

After two months, she still wasn't completely used to the feelings those images woke up inside her. The image of Ragamuffin holding their son, the image of the two of them playing together, the image of her son lying in his warm, small bed. She strangely tingled inside as euphoria filled her mind and some sort of happiness whooshed in her ears, propelling itself through her body.

It wasn't the happiness that she had felt so many times when she was a kid. It wasn't the happiness that she had often had at the sight of a toy, when she ate sweets or when she hugged some cute kitty.

It was a different kind, a much deeper happiness, that didn't pass away, that remained there, stuck to her heart, clothing it like a warm veil.

Imprinting itself for life.

"I bet he'll fly." Ragamuffin stated and the pride in his voice was so obvious, it was practically visible. His hand lightly brushed over their son's short, black hair.

"Well, he is just a smaller version of you, after all." Pooty explained in thought, scratching the edge of his metallic head, the part that was probably supposed to be his chin. "So yeah… he'll definitely fly and eat people." If Pooty could change his expression, Lenore was sure that he would cringe at the idea.

"A smaller version of him, with  _my_ eyes." Lenore promptly repeated as if they didn't understand. She was somewhat upset that they always compared him to Ragamuffin and almost never to her. "He's my child, too. He must have other traits of mine as well."

"I'm sure he has." Ragamuffin comfortingly replied. He stretched his arm, probably trying to caress her hair, but Lenore still had some kind of irrational aversion to him, because everyone constantly recognized their child as being so much like him.

So she pushed his hand away and glared.

"I just hope he doesn't have your personality or your brains." Ragamuffin grumbled in annoyance.

Her mouth turned into a tight line as her blue eyes glazed over with anger.

"I hope he doesn't turn out to be an evil bastard like you." She retorted in the same way, sensing the fury inside growing more and more. "But it's so convenient to you, isn't it? You'll both live hundreds of years from now on, while I'll just end up dead and buried six feet under the ground." She continued in bitterness.

It was so quiet that she had the impression time stopped for a few moments. None of them said anything, as a heavy stillness surrounded them, filling the night's cool air. The garden stretched around them, beautiful and somewhat brooding, and Lenore turned her head, staring at the ground, regretting that she ruined the nice time they were having together.

"Don't say that, Lenore." Ragamuffin spoke in regret and worry, as his arm tentatively reached out and covered her shoulders, bringing her to his chest. She didn't push him away this time. She just rested on him as she carefully took their son into her arms. She felt her heart warming, swelling as an overwhelming affection clutched at it.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ruin this." She murmured, while she was lovingly holding the small child. Ragamuffin's lips pressed into her right temple, which made her turn her head and capture his mouth with hers. Blood rushed to her cheeks before the warmth spread on her entire face. She forgot about everyone and everything as they stood there, lips pressed together, and a wave of emotions washed over her when Ragamuffin completely trapped her into his arms, bringing her closer to him.

The only thing that brought them to earth was someone clearing his voice, trying to catch their attention. She escaped a small whine when Ragamuffin broke their kiss and turned his head towards Pooty, who had been staring at them for a while.

"I would love to see more of what you were planning to do, but I have to tell you something." He announced them. "It's about your presumably ephemeral existence, Lenore."

All the romantic bliss snapped away from her as a weight dropped into her stomach, only to lodge in her throat, making her swallow heavily.

"It's not ephemeral." He carried on.

They both stared at Pooty, more confused than ever. How was that possible? If she died, she would definitely stay dead.

Unless she would stay dead in her own way, just like she had done it before.

"What you actually mean is…" She started uncertainly.

"Exactly." Pooty finished. "You're Lenore. Even if you die, you will return. That's what you do. That's what you have constantly done for a hundred years."

They remained silent, all of them quite taken aback by the sudden realization.

"Of course, if you die, you should at least do it while you're still young. I suppose you don't want to die of old age and then keep your body like that for the next few hundred years." Pooty told her, a slight humor present in his tone, which made her frown, because she was sure he imagined her as an old woman for a few moments. When her mind formed that image, she shuddered, quite terrified.

"Alright." She spoke decided. "I'll do it." She looked down at the little child in her arms, then at Ragamuffin, who was quite unconvinced by the fact that she was still able to come back from the dead. There were many emotions behind his gaze, mostly disbelief, concern, and fear for her.

That was why he had probably stopped her from committing suicide, right after the witch had given her life. He grasped her hand and squeezed it tightly, before he looked at Pooty.

"You better be right about this." He said, frowning.

She felt his arms tightening around her protectively.

Lenore didn't know if Pooty was actually right. She shared some of the doubt Ragamuffin had, regarding the plan, but she couldn't find other option. That was the only way she could stay forever with Ragamuffin and their son. She had to try it despite that she was probably risking everything.

The child suddenly lifted his small arms towards her and she felt like she was going to implode from all the feelings that jabbed at her chest. She lightly grasped his fragile, small hand into hers, before she smiled and nuzzled him playfully, making him give a heartwarming, cute laugh. Then she studied him again, as she caressed his forehead. His skin was really pallid, his hair was jet black and messy, his features and everything about him really reminded her of Ragamuffin. And she knew that the little fangs that were going to grow would complete the picture.

No matter how much she wanted to find another resemblance to her, apart from the eyes, she knew that she wouldn't find it. Because they were right.

He really was a mini Ragamuffin.

"Are you sure you want to do it?" Ragamuffin inquired, still worried about her decision to kill herself.

"Yes." She answered, gazing at the little being that was staring at her with big, blue eyes.

"So… when are you doing it?" Pooty asked.

She raised her eyes and blinked a few times, thinking about how to tell them about her new made decision, so that it wouldn't be too much of a shock to them, especially to Ragamuffin. She was aware that it would actually be a surprise to anyone, especially after the torturing experience they all passed through and the horrifying agony that almost tore her to pieces.

"A year or two from now on."

She saw Ragamuffin and Pooty exchange strange, bewildered looks, which made the corners of her mouth curl upwards. The baby shifted in her arms and she clutched him tighter to her chest, her serene smile widening.

"Why then?" There was hesitation in Ragamuffin's voice, as if he knew that she was up to something, which was in her favor, since she wanted him to be prepared for what she was about to say. She had always been an expert at shocking everyone.

She looked down at the small boy, at his barely noticeable smile revealed by the white moonlight that was beating down on them.

"Because I want a little Lenore too."

 

 


End file.
